Here I was minding my own business. (Don’t even say it. Yes, I can once in a while.) I was sitting in the booth, next to the counter, eating my dinner having a nice little chat with the guys. It was the typical truck stop diner counter conversation about the weather and where we were […]
A farmer was selling his peaches door to door. He knocked on a door and a shapely 30-something woman dressed in a very sheer negligee answered the door. He raised his basket to show her the peaches and asked, “Would you like to buy some peaches?” She pulled the top of the negligee to one side and […]
“If you have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four. You may be a Muslim.” “If you can’t think of anyone you haven’t declared Jihad against. You may be a Muslim.” “If you were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs. You may […]
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you would have $49.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you would have $33.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago, you would have $0.00 today. But, if […]
Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient. Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly. Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent. Squirrel who runs up woman’s leg will not find nuts. Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion. Man who runs in front of car gets tired, man who […]
Might have to move to Rockville, Maryland… If you’re not going to listen to your mother and keep your language clean, you’re going to have to answer to the law in Rockville, Maryland. Here, it’s illegal to swear within earshot of other people, whether you’re on a street, sidewalk or highway. The penalty is a […]
BREAKING NEWS: The Pity Train has just derailed at the intersection of Suck It Up & Move On, and crashed into We All Have Problems, before coming to a complete stop at Get the Hell Over It. Any complaints about how we operate, forward em to 1-800-waa-aaah with Dr. Whogivzadamn Reporting LIVE from Quitchur Bitchin.’ […]