We’ve all heard countless times before how laughter is the best medicine.
I disagree. I believe laughter takes second fiddle to crying. I’m not talking about the little cry when you stub your toe on the dresser.
I’m talking about the crying that comes from deep down in the center of ones Soul. The kind of thing that happens when we lose a Dear loved one.
My close friends know me to be hard as steel and cold as stone. Little do they know that its just a facade. An exterior, a facade.
Monday morning, I found myself in the bedroom dressing for the long day that lay ahead. I buttoned my collar button and tied the perfect knot in my tie. As I picked up my coat, something unusual happened. I’d lost my usual stone cold hard facade.
I somehow managed to make it through the funeral service. Everyone was finding a seat for lunch. I was just fine until my Dear Mother walked over and whispered in my ear “its ok to smile.”
I told my Mother I couldn’t. The pain was to deep. I hurt too bad to smile. I stood there. In the middle of the Social hall. Hugging my Mother as the tears rolled down my face. I finally sat at the table with my Dear Wife and children. I’m not sure how long I sat in that chair with my head in my hands. Tears pouring down like rain. Crying. A man in deep pain. I remember my Father hugging my from behind. I remember my son Alex moving over and taking the chair next to me. He too was crying. He was crying because he could see his Daddy was in pain. I remember thinking I needed to be strong. Strong for my Family. They needed that from me.
Much to my displeasure (though I know it was for my own good) my Dear Wife Tammy and Aunt Margaret made countless attempts to get me to smile and laugh. Their attempts were in vain. I could not laugh nor smile. For it was my day to mourn the loss of my Grand Father.
It is for me crying that is the best medicine. Crying heal all wounds. Even the deepest.
Laughter and a smile will come in time.
—@QBall45
5/12/10
